The entire year was one of personal discovery. I started spending time surfing the Internet trying to understand how I felt about nudity. I was unconvinced that the understanding I had was anywhere near sufficient for me. So, with the accessibility of almost any subject and the relative anonymity of the Internet, I decided it was time to learn some things I felt I needed to know. I knew I didn't really feel the same way about nudity as nearly everyone close to me seemed to, but I had never been able to put a finger on it and understand exactly why or even exactly how I did feel about it. Through a life-long desire and the encouragement of many ideas from various web sites, I decided that I wanted to take a nude hike. But, not being prepared to tell anyone about it, I really didn't know when, or even if, I would get an opportunity to do it.
To my pleasant surprise, however, the opportunity presented itself, rather unexpectedly, when several things came together at the same time . And, the most amazing part of all, the late fall weather was amazingly warm. In fact, for mid to late November, the weather was too good to resist. I had many other things I otherwise could have been doing that day. But, the conditions were too perfect to actually finally take the nude hike that I had been wanting to experience for so long. Although I had throughout my entire life taken advantage of solitary, and what seemed like very safe, opportunities to be nude without anybody else knowing about it, I wasn't sure I had ever done anything that could really be considered nearly as bold and daring as a hike. I had been too concerned about discovery and the reactions of others to actually be out in the wide open, in broad daylight for that amount of time. But, I decided that I was probably being overly paranoid and I really wanted to know what it was like. I'd come to realize that there were in fact others doing it, something I would not previously have even imagined. So, I somehow managed to get the courage, made the time, and went for it.
It was an absolutely beautiful day, especially for that late in the year. The sky was perfectly clear blue, the temperature was around 60 degrees. It was a day to remember, and one that I believe I will remember for the rest of my life. I got in my truck and proceeded to find a suitable location. I found a nice location some distance away from my house, in the mountains, with a reasonably pretty canyon and general area, at least for a very dry area and bare trees in November. This area has many old dirt roads, of varying quality, that are no longer maintained at all. Many of them have declined to the point of being difficult to travel. So, they can only be traveled by 4x4 or ATV, if that. Some can only be reasonably traveled by foot, or perhaps horse.
After driving my truck along some of the better parts of these dirt roads for a fair distance, I decided to park the truck and walk on or near the road, such as it was, to see what I could see. I got out of the truck and looked around carefully to make sure I couldn't hear or see anyone else. Then I completely undressed, except for shoes and socks. I had taken a pair of baggy shorts, planning to carry them with me to quickly slip on over my shoes in case anyone surprised me. But, after spending a while walking around near the truck, I felt quite comfortable that nobody was there in the remote, hard to get to location, in November, during the middle of a weekday. So, I decided to leave virtually everything in the truck and start hiking. I started walking wearing only my shoes and socks, and carrying absolutely nothing.
After probably about a mile or two, I reached a ridge where I could overlook the valley below. I walked out onto the ridge, and enjoyed the view. I was thinking that what I was seeing looked much more amazing than I had ever seen it look before. I thought it would have made for a fabulous picture, and wished I'd brought a camera. I greatly enjoyed soaking in the warm sunshine there on the ridge for a while. The sun seemed to shine more brightly and more pleasantly than it had ever done before. I began to more fully appreciate the world that was all around me and that somehow seemed more real than it had ever seemed before. Rather than merely being in nature, I felt like I was actually a part of it. God had surely created a wonderful earth, and even more amazingly, he had created me too. I greatly enjoyed the completely natural feeling of just being there, alone, peaceful, unclothed, and truly enjoying life.
As I looked at the road back to the truck, the realization came to me that it looked like a wonderful jogging trail. So, off I went. What a feeling! Jogging along, watching my footing in the loose rocks and dirt, as free as free can possibly be! The sun, the breeze, the natural heat created by jogging, wonderfully and peacefully being drawn away into the beautiful day. It all felt magnificent! My long wait for an opportunity to have this kind of experience was being greatly rewarded. It certainly didn't feel dirty in the least. It didn't feel wrong at all. It felt incredibly freeing. It felt triumphant. It felt like I could do this every day for the rest of my life and my life would be better for it.
The downhill jog back to the truck went much faster than the uphill walk away from it, naturally. And, I wasn't ready to leave. I didn't want the experience to end. I decided to walk and run around the surrounding hills for a bit longer to prolong it. All together, I was there for a good hour and a half. In the end, it seemed much too short. I couldn't wait to do it again. But, I would have to. A few days later the weather changed, and that area was covered in several feet of snow.
I returned home and continued doing the things that I needed to get done. That included a shopping trip. So, that evening, I was shopping at a very crowded store with people darting in front of me everywhere, like they always do, especially as the Christmas shopping season gets going. Suddenly, I felt my eyes glaze over. I was wishing I could go back to that afternoon. It was so much more pleasant than fighting that crowd. I guess we can't be naturally enjoying nature all of the time, unfortunately. Maybe we wouldn't appreciate those precious moments quite as much if we could.
After my hike, I pondered and prayed seemingly almost constantly for days and days to understand how I felt and what I had experienced. After a while the answer came. I feel like I literally received a personal revelation from my Heavenly Father telling me that if I wished to experience nudity, it was o.k. within limits, and that "naturism" (a term with which I had become familiar, but not to any great extent) was the right way. The experience took place throughout a nearly sleepless night and I spent most of the next day writing down how I felt about it. Unfortunately, I later destroyed what I wrote fearing its discovery by someone who might not understand it. Through something of a minor miracle, I made contact with and actually met another local individual with the intent to share nude hiking and related experiences. To my utter shock, I discovered that he, like me, was a very religious individual and committed to that religion.
Shortly after the awakening that resulted from my hike, and with the realization that there was indeed at least one other individual that seemed to feel just like me, I decided to do more Internet searching. I vaguely remembered surfing into a site about my own religion and nudity about a year previously. But, at that time I didn't even read it, but rather dismissed it as a group that was looking for a way to get themselves into big trouble in short order. At the time, I simply couldn't believe that nudity and religion, especially mine, could be compatible in any way. I found the site again. But this time, it felt like I had just found home. With the help of my newly-found friends, I began to expand my understanding in ways I really had never even thought about before. With the arrival of spring the next year I began learning and experiencing some incredibly wonderful things that I had never previously even dreamed possible. Including sharing the experience of outdoor nudity with others who felt just like I did about it. People that, not long before, I would not have even believed existed. Good people that quickly became good friends.
I now consider myself something of a naturist and have begun the challenge of a lifetime. To whom, how, and how much to reveal, to those who know me, about my feelings and activities. Given my commitment to an 11-year marriage and two daughters, some of the answers to that question are obvious. But, by very intentional design, I have surrounded myself with others with extremely strong and clear beliefs regarding right and wrong. Their extremely negative reaction to my disclosing my thoughts to them is simply expected. So far, I've seldom been pleasantly surprised by the reaction. How do I successfully communicate to them what it took me over 30 years to figure out? Not to mention, my learning continues. I read naturist material. I have contact with other naturists. I have joined others for a number of naturist activities. At the same time, never have I been more committed to having frequent, humble, and sincere communication with my Heavenly Father and earnestly seeking to do His will. I look back and hardly recognize myself. But, despite the perception of some, this change has been unbelievably good.
Ben
They say that a picture is worth a thousand words, and I do believe in the ability of photography to communicate things that words alone cannot. For this reason I include some images here of me on my hiking/running and/or skinny-dipping outings. I hope that these help to communicate my feelings of wonder, comfort, enjoyment and true child-like innocence associated with these activities.
Additional photos from a few of my hikes
All photos are the personal property of the site owner. Any other use without written permission is prohibited.
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